Hank Boris

Hank Boris, full name, Hankington Borisson, also known as X Jobi 2.0, Hank Boris is an upgraded version of the original X Jobi. It is superior in almost every field in comparison to X Jobi. It's only flaw when compared to the earlier model, is that it doesn't have 99 fletching on Runescape. This is a serious issue, I mean come on, if you're gonna be a faggot, do it right.

Vegetarianism
Hank Boris is a vegetarian. Yeah. That's right. Suck it up. You wish you could be as good as this guy. It is rumored that years ago, Hank Boris got very hungry and ate all the Dodo's to extinction. On that day (Yeah, all in one day. What of it?) Hank vowed to never eat meat again. Luckily, no one gives a shit about plants going extinct so he can ravage them as much as he wants.

Perfect Man
Hank Boris is essentially the perfect man. Despite being a member of the Crew, Hank is not a very good soldier, he largely just stands there looking pretty. As Captain Dogga once claimed "If I were gay, I'd go there."

Suh Indie n Stuph
Another thing you should know about Hank Boris. Is that he is just So Indie, it isn't even funny. Unless you too are an indie kid, in which case you would find it funny, just to be a bit more indie.

Now, I don't want you to just stop, drop and think that he is just like any other regular kid, oh goodness no. Not. At. All. Hank Boris is so indie that he got a bunch of his friends, took them down into his basement, made them form a band, forced them to play for him, and then killed them all, so that he would be the only one to ever hear their music. It was Suh Indie Yah!

I heard once that he just went outside and climbed some rocks for fun. I mean come on, how much more indie can you get?